I’m sorry, is my negativity showing?
Sometimes I lie awake in inky blackness, wondering why I can’t seem to get it right.
Which buttons do I push to get this whole thing to work?
How much do I have to grope around in the night?
Sometimes I wish I was an optimist.
And not just a long term optimist, but one who knows today is OK.
I want to be the optimist who knows he won’t forever be swallowed by a suffocating and inky blackness.
That’s not too much to ask, is it? That’s not a tall order once you are done tackling your anxiety.
Once you kill the thought that everything is not OK. Once you put to death the belief that your needs will not be met.
When those wicked thoughts are in their graves, then comes the optimism, right?
I am optimistically hoping so.